I guess it’s a little stupid to care for someone who you know doesn’t care much about you. You’re not supposed to be an attention-grabber but at some point you make yourself look as if you’re one. Why exert time and effort for someone who gets angry for over something so petty? But what’s more frustrating is when your heart tries to distance and save itself from a bad feeling, your brain keeps nagging on your veins to stay still.
Everything screams it’s just a game. Why so serious? It’s just a game so save yourself from the overthinking that raging your thoughts over and over again. It’s just a game so get over it. Red flags are everywhere but you choose to blind yourself that such flags are indeed there. For what reason? Because you always think of the bright side which is only a small portion of the dark intentions covered underneath. You’ve promised yourself not to settle for something less, but for just a touch, just a gesture, the solid promise you marked your heart with is slowly cracking. You’re slowly losing yourself over a game so petty. I guess, time spent shouldn’t really matter that much because time doesn’t justify a man’s actions. It doesn’t justify whether he’s true all these years, or just pretending since that time when he said hello. Would you consider yourself smart for trusting someone who you only knew through guts and not through papers? Well, even papers lie. You know very well that trust must be earned hard and not to be haggled.
If you still want to be in the game, then stick by the unwritten rule . Else, find your way through that exit door and save yourself from the beating. If for some reason, you’re still a stubborn one, then let yourself be defeated.
Sorry not sorry.